Riot really fucked me this patch. Junglers useless. Drawing the fucking short straw. Might as well be support zzz. Baylife, except more like Gaylife. I am angry jungle king, this is me right now, except less good looking and more hair:
The fuck… I stop talking to this chick for months, or rather she gets pissed at me because I say a whole bunch of stupid shit and doesn’t talk to me and pretends I don’t exist, then out of the blue starts talking to me like we were in mid conversation… Headscratch like shit, real.
Proving people wrong is the best / Winning is the best
Rustom’s a noob for the night. I asked him to play support bot lane for me and he’s like k, so i went kog ready to fuck shit up. Except, Rustom is a shitty support player, and wound up stealing my gold and letting me take hits all day. Thank god Washington was a fucking dragon and our Tryndamere destroyed his lane, their jungler, and mid lane. all i had to really do was hold bot off from being taken, and aim for the tank in teamfights, so we managed to make them surrender. He got mad at me for calling him out and was like “if supports so easy wahwahwahwah you play it then” i was like lol k, went blitzcrank with cv and heal, we wrecked their nunu trist lane, dat kennen/blitz bot duo ap meta bullshit. Plus we had a maokai jungle, always one of my favorite junglers, i should buy him soon after Shaco, and Karthus, and Vlad, and Cass. maybe before them, since i cant actually play AP champions. But Shaco first though, only need like 400 more IP. Then i can just destroy solo queue
“I hate you, Google. You’ve caused a lot of problems in my relationship. I share a computer with my girlfriend and she would look up anything. “I’m going to look up apples today.” She just hits ‘A.’ It’s “Asian ass porn” instantly. Google is, like, “I’ll take it from here. I know exactly what you’re looking up… Well, every time you hit ‘A,’ it’s ‘Asian ass porn.’” Google! All I ask is that you let her type three letters before you jump to such a bold conclusion.”—Daniel Tosh, Completely Serious (via babyredfish)
“It’s every band’s right, you shouldn’t have to do fucking Glee. And then the guy who created Glee is so offended that we’re not, like, begging to be on his fucking show… fuck that guy for thinking anybody and everybody should want to do Glee.”
”—DAVE GROHL, Foo Fighters frontman, calling out Glee creator Ryan Murphy for pressuring bands to license their songs for the show (via bynortheast)
Today was “we’ve thrown Joe to the wolves, now lets throw him to the fucking grizzly bears” day. First i had to spar Beau, big 250 military ass monster that was just rocking me with big nasty hooks all day. Then i got to fight Rob, who’s pretty much a more pissed off version of Jason Statham, absolutely wailed on me for Brent’s idea of 2 minutes, which is more like 6. That doesn’t sound like a lot, but think of it like this. You’ve just gotten punched in the face for the past 3 minutes by someone twice your size. Now, someone that hits harder than the last guy but hits you three times as much is just wailing on you because he broke his nose last week and is making sure you don’t get a chance to hit him back, and every time he lands a punch into your stomach you get the wind knocked out of you. Now imagine 6 minutes straight of that. Not for the faint of heart. I almost had a break for the third round, except the guy I had to fight was at least 200 pounds, and at that point I was too tired to keep my hands up to block his haymakers, so essentially we took turns slugging each other in the face. If it weren’t for him being new, and out of shape, and fat, he probably would’ve kicked my ass too. Then fucking Niko starts hitting me before i even put my gloves back on, too tired to fight her at that point so i spent most of the round kicking her away from me and moving around in a circle until time was up. I ain’t even mad though, the more of this I do, the more Brent will realize that I would whip anyone’s ass that tries to fight me at my own weight class. Now I play dead… err, the waiting game.
If it weren’t for the fact that I don’t smoke weed, we probably could’ve picked up/scored with a pair of cute girls tonight… The things I do for kickboxing. BRB, gonna go eat myself to death via Oreo overdose. Time to drown in milk…